What the elders teach you...

I used to be a firm believer in "As you sow, so shall you reap"...

But when I see the people around me and find that all those who did the maximum good in their lifetimes are those who suffer the max today, while those who took it easy - personally, morally, ethically, are the ones who live well, I am forced to relook at my belief.

My belief took a massive beating when my Papa was diagnosed with cancer in 2007. Papa had always led a very full life, exercised regularly, had moderate eating habits, disdained the use of processed foods and hardly ever indulged in any excesses - was a tea-totaller, non-smoker, non-drinker and vegetarian to boot. He was a paragon of good behaviour and suddenly diagnosed with the dreaded "C".

Joking with Papa, I told him that I may as well start smoking, coz that is all I never did. I am given to indulging myself to the hilt..., and if the disease could strike him with his "model" behaviour, then what was the point in being good???

I was cribbing to one of my favourite cousins, who I really respect a lot, around two years ago, telling him why I thought things were not right with this world - this must be around the time when Papa was not responding to treatment well and was in tremendous pain.

I told Bhaiya that "Jaisa Karoge Waisa Bharoge" and "Acchhe Karm karoge to acchha hoga" were idle sayings, with no substance. I gave him Papa's example and told him that if Papa could be so unwell and so much in pain despite the best behaviour and amazing personal habits, then I really did not believe in any of these sayings anymore.

And this is what Bhaiya had to tell me...

He told me that the fact that Papa was living with such a dreaded disease and yet leading a full life had to mean something. Papa has never ever been dependent on others - he looks after himself despite long bouts of Chemotherapy. This had to be the Acchhe Karm and his strong personality that were allowing him to successfully look at the disease, not give up, combat the disease, and try and come up on tops, when most mortals wither away with ordinary fevers...

He forced me to look at the proverbial "glass half-empty or half full" situation and I have been more reconciled to the situation since then.

Incidentally, it has been around 30 months that Papa was diagnosed with the disease and he remains hale and hearty - though not as well as he could be and amazingly independent despite the 5 painkillers that he has daily...

Thank God for the elders in the family to reinforce your belief in what is right and wrong...

Thanks a lot Bhaiya...